Steve: Hi, this is Steve Webb, your OG Godcaster.
Steve: You're about to hear the LifeSpring Advent Calendar, which was recorded in 2006.
Steve: It's a daily show which will run right up to Christmas Day,
Steve: so be sure to subscribe so you don't miss an episode.
Steve: Now, the story of Advent and Christmas is a timeless story, so it doesn't age.
Steve: However, the links and the phone numbers mentioned on the podcast have all changed but one.
Steve: WhyChristmas.com is still current and active,
Steve: and it's the best Christmas information website on the Internet.
Steve: Lifespringpodcast.com now forwards you to Lifespringmedia.com.
Steve: And the phone number you'll hear on the show is changed to plus 1-951-732-8511.
Steve: Hi there, I'm Steve Webb and this is Day 12 of the Lifespring Advent Calendar.
Steve: I'm so glad you're here.
Steve: We're nearly halfway through the calendar, so I hope you're all half ready for Christmas.
Steve: Let's open today's door and see what's behind it.
Music: Grandma got run over by a reindeer.
James: Today, Steve, we're going to be finding out about a Christmas custom that I don't think you have much over in the USA, and that's Christmas crackers.
James: If you haven't heard about these before, they're a great addition to the Christmas dinner table.
Steve: Well, James, I've done some research, and I found out that they were first made in your country, in the UK, in 1850 by a London sweet maker or candy maker called Tom Smith, and his name is still a big one in crackers.
Steve: He wanted a new way of selling his sweets.
Steve: Tom had been over to Paris and seen how they wrapped their posh sweets called bonbons in colored paper
Steve: and wondered if he could do a similar thing.
Steve: Then one night, while he was sitting in front of his log fire, the crackling of the fire made him think.
James: What if I wrap my sweets in a colored wrapping and then when you open them they go bang?
James: Oh, and I could include a toy in them as well.
James: Then people would be bound to buy them.
Steve: So, the first Christmas cracker was born.
Steve: Crackers today are short cardboard tubes wrapped in colorful paper.
Steve: There's normally a cracker next to each plate at the Christmas dinner table.
Steve: Crackers in a colorful party hat, a toy or a gift, and a festive joke.
Steve: The party hats look like crowns, and it's thought that they symbolize the crowns that might have been worn by the wise men.
James: But perhaps the thing that crackers are most famous for are their jokes.
James: They're notorious for being very bad indeed, so here for your listening pleasure, or something like that,
James: or a selection of cracker jokes about Christmas.
Steve: Today I'm joined by my sons Timothy and Steven.
Steve: So guys, what have you got for me?
Steven: How do snowmen get around?
Steve: I don't know, Steven, how do they get around?
Steven: They ride an icicle.
Timothy: How does good King Wintesloss like his pizzas?
Steve: Well, Timothy, I don't know, with pepperoni?
Timothy: One that's deep, pan, crisp, and even.
Steve: Okay
Steven: Who hides in the bakery at Christmas?
Steve: I don't know
Steven: A mince spy
Steven: Okay
Timothy: Why did Santa's helper see the doctor?
Steve: I don't know
Timothy: Because he had a low elf esteem
Steven: What did Adam say on the day before Christmas?
Steve: I give up
Steven: It's Christmas, Eve
Steven: Okay
Timothy: What does Father Christmas suffer from if he gets stuck in a chimney?
Steve: I don't know what.
Timothy: Claustrophobia.
Steve: Oh, that's a good one for you.
Steve: Timothy's really claustrophobic.
Steve: Okay, do you have any more?
Steven: Yeah, we got a few left.
Steve: Okay.
Steven: Why does Santa have three gardens?
Steve: I know this one.
Steven: You do?
Steve: I do.
Steven: Okay.
Steve: So he can ho, ho, ho.
Steven: That's right.
Steve: I heard that one about 25 years ago.
Steve: Okay.
Timothy: What carol is heard in the desert?
Speaker 6: I don't know.
Speaker 6: What?
Timothy: O camel, ye faithful.
Steve: Okay.
Steven: What is the best Christmas present in the world?
Steve: Okay, what?
Steven: A broken drum. You just can't beat it.
Steve: Okay.
Timothy: How do sheep in Mexico say Merry Christmas?
Steve: I don't know. How?
Timothy: Feliz Navidad.
Steve: Okay.
Timothy: I got a couple more for you if you'd like to hear them.
Steve: I'd love to hear them, Tim.
Timothy: How did Ebenezer Scrooge win the football game?
Steve: I don't know. How?
Timothy: The ghost of Christmas past.
Steve: Okay.
Timothy: What do you call a cat in the desert?
Steve: A cat in the desert.
Steve: Ah, Sandy Claus!
Timothy: Yep.
Steve: Thank you, guys.
Steve: Oh, those are bad.
James: So there you have it.
James: I hope your crackers go off with a bang,
James: and remember that there are only 25 letters in the Christmas alphabet
James: because the angels said Noel.
Steve: Well, thank you, James, I think.
Steve: Thank you, Steven and Timothy.
Steve: Thank you, dear listener, for listening to day number 12 of the Lifespring Advent Calendar.
Steve: Of course, the theme music today was Brian Duncan and the Neo Soul Band with This Christmas.
Steve: Background music was Dr. Elmo with Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer.
Steve: For James Cooper, I'm Steve Webb.
Music: Last forever.
Music: It's a love that I get from you.
Music: It never gets old.